Pissing match

OK, I'm just going to go with the urinary theme...this online poker commercial is my worst nightmare, or ultimate bathroom fantasy scenario, depending. No, that's not as gay as it sounds. Or it's only as gay as this video.

Seriously, though, do guys try to out-piss each other in public like this? I guess they do, because I just found this excellent and very revealing post on "urinal politics" by Roland Couture:

My theory here, is that the question of male dominance is being played out in those urinals. "Territorial pissing" and "pissing match" are no empty phrases. All sorts of animals piss to mark their territory. Why canst thou not relax and let fly thy mighty arcing stream of urine, when there's a guy standing at the next urinal? Because he is basically right there all up in your space, and perhaps, unconsciously, a threat to you. The sphincter muscle in your urethra is cinched-up tight! Meanwhile, why doth his urine fly strong and true to its porcelain vessel? Because he is relaxed, and this is because you are no threat to him. He gets to piss freely; you, on the other hand, cannot, and must wait. You just lost the struggle for dominance, buddy!

Well, I might be full of it, but it's fun to play it like a game that way. Ha ha, I pissed and you didn't! I win!

Well, I guess that puts my shy bladder problem into perspective. Actually, I have surreptitiously witnessed this phenomenon while washing my hands and other guys are using the urinals.

He doesn't even mention guys who use the stalls to piss. I guess we're so low that we're not even anywhere in the alpha male/beta male hierarchy. Probably just as well. I've never had much desire to prove myself in pissing matches, literal or otherwise.